Bald Men

Trying to learn more about “bald men”? Turns out you’re not alone. In fact, LOTS of people snoop around online in places like Google for info about this topic all the time. Check out what they’re asking about (and what we can learn from others’ searches) below.

61% Chance that YOU are a Bald Man

If you are a man over the age of 17, the chances are that you are already on the slippery slope to becoming a combover. Assuming that you’ve made it to this webpage, you are at least 61% likely to be bald. Why else would you be here? Its because you are secretly afraid of going bald, know you’re going bald, but are trying to avoid the truth until later on in life. This path leads to combovers, which take decades to develop. Do you think combover men woke up one morning and thought that would be a good hair-do? Nope!! It takes decades of self-denial to create and maintain a combover, which you are already doing if you’re within this 61%.

As Yoda might say, “Manhood leads to baldness, baldness leads to denial, denial leads to subtle combovers, and this leads to big combovers. Face your denial, you must.”

What People Look For Online About “Bald Men”

Online searches surrounding the topic of “bald men” exhibit a distinct pride and reverence for men who have no hair on their heads. Unlike searches which include words like “hair loss”, “baldness pills”, or “hair replacement surgery” (all phrases used by SUCKERS), people looking for bald men really know what they want: bald men. And what’s not to want?

Bald Men with Beards & Hair in Other Places

There are many funny searches surrounding guys with no hair on top but lots of hair in other places, including, “bald men with beards”, “hairy chest muscle bald men”, and “hairy chested bald man.” Other funny searches, presumably used by help lock-up a bald headed hottie for themselves include “hot bald men”, “bald gay men”, “attractive bald men”, and “bald chubby senior men.”

The funniest phrases in this collection are, without a doubt, “women who love fat bald men”, “bald men support group”, “naked bald men”, and “bald men and penis size.” Do people really search this stuff?!

Check out what this bald man is thinking about:

So far, this balding man is not a sucker. He has not bought a toupee or strange hair loss pills. But he’s also not very positive about things. At least not yet! That’s because being happy about being bald is very upper-level. Hopefully he’ll start being happy about being bald soon!

Famous Bald Men

Think a lack of hair kept people like Shakespeare, Gandhi, Winston Churchill, Zidane, Mr. Clean, or Mark Messier from doing great things? Think again!

Hairstyles for Bald Men

Many men are uncertain of what type of hairstyle to choose once they’re bald. The truth is that just about any hairstyle is good for a bald man, provided it is not some form or veiled combover or attempt at compensation. However, assuming you’re beyond that rubbish, bald men can attractively wear their hair long, curl it up, keep a close shave, or deal with a short clipping or a buzz cut. So long as you’re bald and bold about it, just about any hairstyle will do.

But please, for the love of all things holy: if you’re mid-way through going bald or just beginning to go bald, DO NOT ATTEMPT TO LIVE LIFE AS THOUGH YOU HAVE A FULL HEAD OF HAIR. You will only look bad and likely develop a combover. This is the worst thing that can happen to you.

Hair Loss is Awesome’s Library of Baldness

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Bald Men

61% Chance that YOU are a Bald Man

What People Look For Online About “Bald Men”

Bald Men with Beards & Hair in Other Places

Famous Bald Men

Hairstyles for Bald Men

Popular Questions Which Include the Words “Bald Men”

Hair Loss is Awesome’s Library of Baldness

Welcome to Hair Loss is Awesome

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